Funeral information

January 02, 2011 :: Posted by - admin :: Category - General Update

Tuesday, Jan 4

11am – JB Tallent Funeral Home

1937 Sharon-Amity Rd at intersection of Monroe Rd

Phil’s journey is over

January 02, 2011 :: Posted by - admin :: Category - General Update

I’m so sad to have to tell you all that Philip lost his battle with liver disease at approximately 3:30 today, January 2. Funeral arrangements are still pending but the funeral will take place on Tuesday morning. I will post the details as soon as I know them. Randy & Shelly will be accompanying Philip’s body back to Charlotte late tonight.  Please email me at LKINCHAR@yahoo.com if you want to participate in helping the family with lunch or dinner meals over the next few weeks.

Thanks to all of you for your support to Randy, Shelly and Philip over these past several months. Your words of love and prayer and encouragement have meant so much to them. Please keep up with the blog as I am sure Randy will continue to journal for the next few weeks.

Lorrie Klemons

704-846-6790

WE WAIT

January 02, 2011 :: Posted by - admin :: Category - General Update

Philip is resting today. Yesterday was exhausting for us all. He was very clear of mind and able to speak very softly.  The morning was sad for him as he expressed his sadness about leaving. Lee arrived and Phil was able to express his concerns and asked Lee to watch out for us, particularly me. We all listened carefully, expressed our deep love to each other and explained that we would be very sad without him, but that we would be fine. We discussed the things that need to be taken care of such as Ditto. The afternoon was filled with remembrances and he joined us in some songs that he always liked to sing. He was able to talk to each of us alone, and get everything said he wanted to. Now he says he is ready to go. This morning we are at his bedside.

A PARENTS CHILD

December 31, 2010 :: Posted by - admin :: Category - General Update

I have never been satisfied with anyone’s explanation of what a parent’s love for their child is. You must be a parent to really understand what true unconditional love is all about. You could talk about the euphoria you feel just after the birth of your child. Who can explain the deep joy, the connection, the emotional commitment you never dreamed possible. You never forget their first cold, the worry, the concern, am I doing the right things? Is there anything I can do to make it easier on my child? How should I react?   I don’t want to overreact. There is the child’s pain of teething. You really can’t stand the pain your child is going through at that time, and then there is the joy of hearing the clang of their first tooth.  The milestones come one right after another. There will be tricycles, bicycles and cars. Every day will be a new adventure filled with excitement and curiosity. He will be crawling to find things you never thought would be interesting that are on the floor. There is the ecstasy of their first step. First walking around furniture and then letting go. Neither parents nor children have any idea of the significance of those first steps of new independence. It will be a lifetime of steps towards independence. There will be the precious questions that you can hardly believe are so clever and so insightful that your child is asking. There will be perceptions that need more explanation. There will be their friends that you really like, and their friends that don’t please you as much. There will be outfits that they put on that make them cuter then you can imagine. There will be the first time they can read you a story and the first time they read something out of the newspaper and apply it to a conversation. There will conversations about sex, alcohol, drugs, religious beliefs and death. There will be moments when they need discipline. There will be moments when they will need support.

There will be moments when they seek advice or some type of intervention. They will make mistakes and you will hope that you are their soft place to fall. Have you established a relationship where they can tell you their mistakes?  Have you expressed your love every day? Is your advice important to them? Do you talk things over when you are making decisions that affect all of you?  Have you come to know your child well enough that you can help them learn about themselves? Have you set a standard of ethics and values that they can grow from and become better people? Do your children know about giving back personally, physically and financially? Is your child able to laugh easily? Is your child confident that they can fix their own mistakes? Do you know when to let go and let your child fly solo?

Have you given them enough respect for themselves that they can pass it on? It is easy to get a grip on when your parenting begins. You never get a good grip on when your parenting ends. You always  want to be helpful and supportive for as long as you live.

WHAT DAY OF THE WEEK IS IT?

December 30, 2010 :: Posted by - admin :: Category - General Update

I have no idea which day of the week it is. We just keep plugging along from minute to minute. This morning we had a visitor come by and I said to Philip say hello to her. He then verbalized his hello to her succinctly. We were amazed. We were singing songs that we knew he liked, and he was trying to keep time with his shoulders. It is so ironic that Philip’s journey through sickness began with his brain, and yet that is the part of his body that needs no support and keeps going. We are doing our best to keep his room a happy place.

The entire staff has our utmost respect and appreciation. They have used everything they have had at their finger tips to help Philip. His successes have brought smiles to their faces and his defeats have sent them searching for more options The conversations they have had to have with us were not easy. They were straight forward and yet gentle. Every nurse that has come into this room has been well educated and kind-hearted. Their support for us as well as their sensitivity to Philip’s needs goes above and beyond.

The future is not in our hands nor in  staff hands. If it were we could write the outcome, but we can’t.

IT DOESN’T GET EASIER

December 29, 2010 :: Posted by - admin :: Category - General Update

The hours and days seem to be running together as Shelly and I sit together in Philip’s room. We tell him how much we love him and that we know how much he loves us. We kiss him and hug him, we reminisce and we sing songs. He occasionally opens his eyes and tries to say something ,but it usually comes out as grunts. We really think he might be understanding some of what we are saying to him. Sometimes, we sit quietly and just let him rest.  The doctors tell us there is no possibility that he can recover. His body is being kept alive by machinery; his lungs are being aided by a breathing machine, his kidneys are no longer working and a dialysis machine is doing all of the work, his liver is failing, he is unable to take in anything into his stomach  because the digestive system has shut down. My heart is breaking as I watch my sweet son being held up by machinery and medication.

I always promised him that I would tell him the truth about his condition, which I have done. I can’t really say how much he understands and yet on some level I feel that he knows. The understanding we had between us was that I would not keep him alive if he were to become more dependent; yet, he still opens his eyes and makes contact.  My heart and soul are breaking, I want to do the right thing by him. Yet, where there is life there is hope.  We need G-d’s intervention.

The Days Are Sad

December 29, 2010 :: Posted by - admin :: Category - General Update

The days of excitement and optimism are now filled with despair and extreme sadness. Whenever Phil opens his eyes, Randy has hope that he will see her and Shelly and return to a state of awareness and recognition. However, it seems like that is not going to happen without a huge miracle.

Treatment is not going to be discontinued,  but the initiation of any care as complications arise is being discussed right now.

Please keep all of the Sperlings in your heart.

Lorrie

DANG

December 28, 2010 :: Posted by - admin :: Category - General Update

The human spirit is amazing. Our hopes have been squelched by the physicians. Philip’s body seems to be letting him down.

Actually, it is pretty sad and Shelly and I feel it very deeply. The doctors don’t see any chance of him getting a transplant. In my mind I believe them and grieve deeply; however, where there is life there is a spark of hope. I hold onto that tiny spark of hope knowing the probable outcome. I prepare myself for the worst and seem to bounce between despair, acceptance, and hope.

Words can’t begin to express our deep gratitude for your continued support and your outpouring of love and concern.

Another Prayer for Tuesday night, December 28

December 28, 2010 :: Posted by - admin :: Category - General Update

Dear G-d,

Please watch over our beloved Philip as he lies in innocent slumber, with the purest of souls…

With broken hearts we watch as liver disease robs him of his well-being, his health, his dignity, his consciousness, his life…

He makes small movements and small sounds…. communicating in minute fashion to let his parents know he feels their presence.

What is it about the human spirit that wants to soar even when the ugly face of illness attempts to drag it down?

We struggle to understand why this dear, sweet soul must suffer …

The pain of anguished parents’ hearts as they hover over their beloved child…

Ready to protect, defend, love… to give up their own life so that their child might live his.

What gives parents the strength to persevere as their child , devastated by disease, seems to slip away more and more each moment…all control over his well-being slipping through their own hands.

It is You, G-d, who we turn to for that strength… for without our faith, all hope would be lost…taking with it all dreams for good things to come.

Dear G-d, as we gather in common bond and prayer to plead for Phil’s life, please hear our prayers and supplication.

Do not abandon Philip .. protect him in Your merciful embrace and send  him Your healing love… he needs it now more than ever.

AMEN

An Urgent Call For Prayer

December 28, 2010 :: Posted by - admin :: Category - General Update


Our friend Philip Sperling is in critical condition and is in desperate need of our prayers for a total and complete recovery. Please join us Tuesday evening for a chain prayer on his behalf prayer that Philip receive the Divine mercy he needs for a complete recovery. We ask all of you to please recite these psalms listed below and have in mind that Pesach Yakov ben Raizel Pesha should be blessed by G-d Al-mighty with a complete recovery from his illness. Please pass on this message to as many friends as you can reach. Thank You.

The Rabbis at Congregation Ohr HaTorah


Chapter 20

1. For the Conductor, a psalm by David.  2. May the Lord answer you on the day of distress; may the Name of the God of Jacob fortify you.  3. May He send your help from the Sanctuary, and support you from Zion.  4. May He remember all your offerings, and always accept favorably your sacrifices.  5. May He grant you your heart’s desire, and fulfill your every counsel.  6. We will rejoice in your deliverance, and raise our banners in the name of our God; may the Lord fulfill all your wishes.  7. Now I know that the Lord has delivered His anointed one, answering him from His holy heavens with the mighty saving power of His right hand.  8. Some [rely] upon chariots and some upon horses, but we [rely upon and] invoke the Name of the Lord our God.  9. They bend and fall, but we rise and stand firm.  10. Lord, deliver us; may the King answer us on the day we call.

Chapter 6

1. For the Conductor, with instrumental music for the eight-stringed harp, a psalm by David.  2. Lord, do not punish me in Your anger, nor chastise me in Your wrath.  3. Be gracious to me, O Lord, for I languish away; heal me, O Lord, for my bones tremble in fear.  4. My soul is panic-stricken; and You, O Lord, how long [before You help]?  5. Relent, O Lord, deliver my soul; save me for the sake of Your kindness.  6. For there is no remembrance of You in death; who will praise You in the grave?  7. I am weary from sighing; each night I drench my bed, I melt my couch with my tears.  8. My eye has grown dim from vexation, worn out by all my oppressors.  9. Depart from me, all you evildoers, for the Lord has heard the sound of my weeping.  10. The Lord has heard my supplication; the Lord accepts my prayer.  11. All my enemies will be shamed and utterly terrified; they will then repent and be shamed for a moment.